By Michael Spursgeon
The Mendax Hill Country Correspondent
SAN ANTONIO, TEXAS — During a hectic Thanksgiving morning, local resident Jorge Hernandez made a last-minute run to his local H-E-B and inadvertently took home an elderly woman, believing she was his mother.
While Jorge was waiting for the Cowboys game to start, a long-held tradition in his home, his wife Martina reminded him that they were out of marshmallows and dried cranberries.
“Sure, I’ll go to H-E-B real quick,” he said, slightly annoyed. His annoyance was amplified when Martina told him that his mother needed to go with him. “Your mom needs to go to the pharmacy.”
After finding what appeared to be the farthest parking space in the H-E-B lot, Jorge walked slowly alongside his mother toward the entrance. Thinking about the impending start of the game, he rushed his mother to the store pharmacy and then sped off to find the marshmallows and cranberries. After paying, he looked for his mother at the store exit. When he didn’t see her, he headed back to the pharmacy, where he saw what he believed to be his mother holding a small white paper bag. He gently tapped her on the shoulder and said, “Mom, we need to get home,” while he nervously looked at his watch. The old lady nodded in agreement, and they started walking slowly toward the exit.
In the parking lot, after getting into the car, the old lady said to Jorge, “When did you get this new car?” An irked Jorge answered, “It’s been three years, Mom.”
Arriving home, Jorge rushed inside with the supplies, leaving the old lady to make her own way into the house. About 10 minutes later, she entered the house with a perplexed look on her face, and Martina helped her sit in the living room next to Jorge. The old lady then said, “This is very strange, but it seems to be an improvement.”
Martina noticed that something was off with “Grandma” when she started calling the children by the wrong names. “Grandma, that’s Jorge Jr., not Emilio,” Martina corrected her. “Who’s Emilio, anyway?” she added, while the confused old lady stared at the family photos in the room.
At press time, the real mother of Jorge Hernandez was seen wandering the aisles of the H-E-B asking where she could find marshmallows, cranberries, and hopefully her son. Jorge returned to the store at midnight to exchange elderly women and shameful glances with the family of the misplaced old lady, who were relieved to find her safe and sound.
“We should do this again,” the old lady said to Jorge, while trying to give him her home phone number, since she did not own a cell phone.
The other family declined to press charges after the old lady said, “This was the best Thanksgiving dinner I’ve had in decades.”
Disclaimer: The Mendax publishes satirical articles for humor and commentary. None of the stories should be taken as factual reporting. If you do, that’s up to you.
© Copyright 2025. Powered by WordPress Hosting.
